As they always do, the list of charges named against these Fellas included Racketeering. Now, I have to admit that in all the years I have been listening to news reports of charges against alleged mobsters, I've never actually had a grasp of what that term means. Of course, by deduction I have a notion.
That being said, it actually sounds more like a game you'd find guys with names like Chip and Carmichael engaging in at the local Country Club. Maybe that is why these alleged figures fight these charges so hard. I'm sure no street boss worth his salt wants that kind of distinction listed on his rap sheet.
But what was even more interesting to me was listening to the reports of the mob names of some of those indicted. Among them "Roc", "Jack the Whack", "Johnny Banana", Vinny Carwash", and "The Claw". Great stuff! I love nicknames like these. Only the longest of my readers will remember the post I did about our nicknames for Lukas.
There were many, including his Medieval name - Lukie Longshanks - my personal favorite. However, also listed was his very own mob name, Lukie the Prune Faced Boy. We still use it, but Jam has now replaced Prune as his check decoration of choice.
Anyway, all the talk of colorful names left me longing for my very own mob name. So, I did a quick Google search and found a Mafia Name Generator, which only further proves there is a website for everything. Getting excited, at the prompt for my name I typed in what those close to me refer to me as: Jim. Mere seconds later, I had myself my very own gangster name. What was it?
Huh?? At first I was obviously skeptical, and a bit disappointed. Even Mrs. LIAYF was given Jumpy Carlota, although it had nothing to do with her name. I had expected a more colorful version of my own name to be spit out. Something like Jimmy the Finger or even Jimmy Crack Bones. But Jake Costanza? Was that even a legit mob name?
But then it dawned on me. Maybe it was after all. Could this mean I was given a name from New York's infamous Costanza crime family? Being accepted as one of their own? Would a cover job at Vandelay Industries be far behind?
But would I have the stomach for such a name? I had heard rumors that thier Don, Papa Frank, is a powder keg with a reputed short fuse - confirmed when I found the clip below:
How would I ever tell THIS MAN that I was a huge fan of Jay Buhner as a Seattle Mariner?
Smartly, In the end I decided just to stick with Jimmy the Finger.
So tell me readers. What is your mob name?