Friday, December 21, 2012

Step Away From The Sleeping Baby

I can't believe how clueless people can be sometimes. 

I guess it just comes with the territory.  And by territory, I am referring to the territory that surrounds you when you take a newborn baby out in public.  Especially cute ones.  People get all strange when they see them.  It causes them to act in unpredictable ways. Kinda like Tom Cruise around couches.

For example, I was out running errands today with Annabelle.  She was dressed all cute, in a hot pink trimmed fleece jacket with a matching pink bow band on her head. As I was sitting in line at the grocery, a woman came up and smiled at her, sticking her hand very close but thinking better of touching her.  Then she asked "Is it a boy or a girl?"  

Really?  The pink bow didn't give it away?    And don't try to convince me that people just don't want to make assumptions.  I mean, go out on a limb once in a while.

I smiled back at her.  "A girl" I replied. "We think."  Then I started checking out my groceries.

A little while later, thankfully Annabelle was juuuuuuuuust about to fall asleep -  at least she was trying hard to - and I was rocking the stroller back and forth with my breath held tight when out of nowhere a little old lady appears - surprisingly cat like givin her age - and sticks her head practically into the car seat and says "Ohhhhh, what a cwoooooooot whitttttle baaaaby".   If Annabelle had longer hair, I'm sure I would have seen the wind from that old womans breath blowing swiftly through it. Yikes!

Of course Annabelle fussed something awful.  Thankfully I had one of those jogging strollers which allowed me to pivot the thing about 180 degrees the other way in a hurry.  "Sorry" I mouthed to the old woman, then made one of those sleeping gestures with my head tilted to the side.  

As if it wasn't obvious. 

Come on, what is wrong with people!  It's as if the fact that you are around a cute baby automatically makes your brain go to mush.  

Okay, I'll admit that there is a small chance that it's my brain that is going to mush being around this cute baby.  This cute baby who is still waking me up a couple of times a night with her incessant demands for food and clean clothing.

I understand baby language by the way.  Where some might hear whimpers and coos.  I hear "Feed me."  "Change me." "Pinch my cute cheeky's."  "Protect me from scary old ladies who want to disturb my precious sleep".  

And I plan to do just that.

Next time I am out with her running errands while she's trying to sleep, I am thinking about draping a painting tarp over the stroller and pretending like I am off to a job. After all, no one is much interested in a cute can of paint.  Especially little old ladies.

Don't worry Annabelle, Daddy is here.  And your sleep is VERY important to me.


BloggerFather said...

I became an expert at having a "Don't come near me don't even look at me" face while living in New York for 2 years, so I rarely had that problem. It's impossible for me to turn back into my old sweet self nowadays, but I guess being a Dr. Jekyll 4 life is the price I have to pay...

daniel said...

You are NOT alone in this line of thinking. I've been there, all too often.

neal call said...

I totally get the sleep protection obsession. I probably brought it to an unhealthy extreme, even.

But, Addison never actually slept when we were out and about, so I didn't have to worry about it when I was doing errands with her. Much as I'd have liked her to fall asleep in her seat, I can probably count on one hand the number of times she's ever done it.

But, I wouldn't do ANYTHING to disrupt her daily nap or night-time bed-time. It made me ever so popular with friends and family on special occasions.

Diplo_Daddy said...

Stupidity at its finest! But like you, I don't have the heart to tell people to "bug-off" when I really ought to. Creepy old ladies....

James (SeattleDad) said...

@Blogger Father - Ah, the East Coast attitude. I have heard about that. We are sometimes just too nice out West. Maybe I should have just snarled at them. But I couldn't have brought myself to do that. Been a West Coaster all my life.

@daniel - I think we are all thinking those things on the inside.

@Neal - That would be brutal. Thankfully Annabelle sleeps very well in her car seat. So we now stroll a lot.

@Dipplo Daddy - Me either. But I don't think it would phase most old ladies though. They are just focusing on the baby.