Friday, April 17, 2009

Last Minute Reprieve

Pssst....Hey there. Yeah, I'm talking to you Ugly.

Do you know how close you came to getting the axe? Booted? Quietly slipped into the donate pile? Well, now it seems you have gotten a reprieve.


We had high hopes for you in the beginning. But the fact was, Lukas NEVER took to you before now. I'm not going to say it is solely because you're Ugly. I might have thought so, but Elmo is not exactly Abercrombie material either, but that doesn't hurt him.

Ugly Doll. You would think that name alone would have got you further in this house, seeing how it worked for Betty. I prefer to call you an Ugly action figure. I'm not real comfortable with the 'D' word. Yeah, even after nearly two years. It's a guy thing.

Don't give me that look. I was initially on your side. Remember the time I grabbed you and together we shouted out to Lukas "Maverick, I'm your wing man. Take me to your crib or lose me forever!" but he just walked right on by? We had long since surpassed my self imposed limit on stuffed toys in the house. I took that as a sign.

But now, at just about the time I was going to discretely make you disappear, Lukas went and vomited all over his stuffed Monkey. He's ok. Lukas, that is. Not so much for Monkey. And now since you don't smell rancid and sour, you are the chosen one. "Beep-Bop". I hear your name a lot these days, so I guess that means you're safe.
-
It was that close.

11 comments:

Dan said...

I was chosen by my wife in a very similar fashion.

Daddy Geek Boy said...

Ah the Ugly Dolls. You know, I see them everywhere, except for being carried around by kids.

Dad Stuff said...

I guess I'll have to work on not smelling rancid and sour or I might be out the door too.

Ed said...

Ooh, that reminds me. I need to take a shower.

DCUrbanDad said...

We have an Ugly doll too. The MiniKamp could care less about it.

James said...

@Dan - Lol. Thanks for the gut buster.

@Daddy Geek Boy - How true. If it weren't for the vomit incident, Luke's would still be a second class stuffed toy.

@Dad Stuff - Somehow I get a pass.

@Ed - Must be those dead cyotes.

@DC - 2 out of 2 parents surveyed found the Ugly doll to be mostly ignored. Call it scientific.

Momo Fali said...

I have been there. We were going through my son's toy box and came across his blue "Boo Bah" toy from years ago. He NEVER played with it, which is why it was buried. But, suddenly he loved it. Thank goodness it was short-lived love and I was able to toss it after a few months. If I never hear a toy say, "BOOOOOOO BAAAAH" again, that's fine with me!

SciFi Dad said...

Do you think if I showed my baby this story he'd stop spitting up on himself, lest we "throw him out" for smelling rancid too?

James said...

@Momo - BOOOOOOO BAAAAH! Sorry, I couldn't resist. I'm sure somebody is loving that toy somewhere right now.

@SciFi - Hey, it's worth a try. Just teach him to read first.

raino said...

i have always found it rather strange but refreshing all at the same time how children tend to be attracted to the ugly dolls.

it's us adults that are so damn shallow y'know! lol

James said...

@raino - We sure can be. It's a great concept, but you can't force it on the kids. Just hope they take to them.