Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Aged Longer for Extra Flavor

I have a young face. Relatively speaking, of course. I was often carded buying alcohol well after my 21st birthday, including on my 30th. It was annoying to me back then, when I took it as an indication that I still looked like a kid. It definitely wouldn't be annoying now as I have learned to take looking younger than my years as a compliment. I owe the young look to my parents, who have each always looked younger than their years. Doesn't hurt to have it in the genes.

This brings me to this past Sunday. I needed cash for a bus trip and ran up to the corner drug store to make change. Since I was required to purchase something in order to get cash back, and with the household surprisingly not in need of overnight diapers or anything womanly, I sacrificed and grabbed myself an attractive Alaskan named Amber.


Then, as I set Amber and five of her coolest friends on the counter for purchase I noticed the cashier, a guy probably in his early to mid thirties but older looking, glance at my beer then size me up with a discerning sort of stink eye. He literally gave me a look from head to toe with his finger on the register. I, of course, smirked to myself - wondering if I had actually brought my ID and if I was going to be denied my cool refreshment until I proffered proof of my advanced years.

My eyes glanced to the register where it flashed "BIRTHDATE?" Then, with subtle dexterity and still looking me over, the cashier typed in: 07/19/64.

"Hmmm, that ought to do it" he muttered as he finished ringing me up.

I just stood there for several seconds, unable to conjure up a suitable comeback to the stinging but unintentional blow this guy had just bestowed upon me. Apparently, I look 45 years old to at least one person out there. Could he be the only one? Ouch. Fatherhood might be taking a greater toll on me than I realized.

I guess I can officially leave my ID at home now when running out for beer. Sad, but at least I could console myself with a cold drink on a hot day.

19 comments:

Steve said...

Maybe he just assesses everyones age based on their choice of beer and you actually still look as fresh as a daisy. (After all, refused beer at 30...!)

And anyway, what exactly is wrong with being 45 years old?!?!?!

Hmph!

PJ Mullen said...

He was probably just jealous, or it took him that long to do that math :) A belated happy birthday to you.

SciFi Dad said...

So wait... was your birthday on Sunday? I'm confused.

And maybe it wasn't the beer, but the Metamucil you purchased as well that tipped him off to your elderly status.

James (SeattleDad) said...

@Steve - Good point. And there is nothing wrong with 45, unless you are only 41.

@PJ - True, he could have been messing with my head. My birhday isn't until September.

@Scifi - Metamucil = miracle stuff. Anyway, my birthday is in Setember but he was just putting that day's date in and guessing on the year. Maybe he meant to hit the '7' instead of the '6'.

McMommy said...

Duuuuuuuuuuude. You're OLD.
Heh. Heh. Heh.
Signed,
The girl who was just carded for a LOTTO TICKET!!!! NICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

McMommy said...

Just read my comment and realized you know who else could have signed it?

Beavis and Butthead.

heh heh heh heh heh

Lady Mama said...

Hahaha! Oh no! That is funny. And you were all ready to say, no really I am old enough to purchase these! Sucks when you realize you're not the fresh-faced twenty-something you used to be.

James (SeattleDad) said...

@McMommy - One day you will go for that lotto ticket and they won't even think to card you. It will be crushing.

@Lady Mama - Reality Bites, as has been said.

Knatolee said...

Oh, ouch!!!!! But then, 1964 is my birth year. Even ouch-er. I guess I AM old.

Hey, that beer looks good. You Americans are really improving on that. I bet it even has an alcohol content above .05%! ;)


Btw, no way do you look 45! The clerk was obviously legally blind.

Krystal said...

Not gonna say anything because I have never been carded since I was 16 and then on my husband's birthday i got carded so I was all AWESOME!!! then he got carded - I didn't feel so awesome and found out - they card anyone who looks younger than 40 - now I wonder where I fall on that spectrum

WILLIAM said...

This post made me chuckle.

DCUrbanDad said...

You are in your prime.

Captain Dumbass said...

At least you had the beer.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

Thank goodness you had the beer to comfort you on that sad, sad day. ;)

JennyMac said...

He probably rarely sees people buy beer with class. Had you bought Schlitz Malt Liquor, he would have keyed in 1984

JennyMac said...

PS: You have two of my favorite words in your blog. Luke (my 2 year old's name) and Seattle (my hometown and where my entire family still lives.) I knew I had to read you.

carrie said...

This cracked me up! I get so offended when I am not carded.

Drama queens mum (Kimberly) said...

Hi. Visiting from SITS. I don't see too many Daddy bloggers on here. Very cool. I'm trying to get my hubby to blog, but he just isn't interested in it.

ZenMom said...

If he's anything like the goofs who run the register at my local market, he probably thought 2009 minus 1964 equals 35.

I'm just sayin'.